Chalkhills Digest Volume 6, Issue 168
Date: Wednesday, 14 June 2000

         Chalkhills Digest, Volume 6, Number 168

                 Wednesday, 14 June 2000

Topics:

                     Cliched Musicals
                     Well well Weller
An open letter to TVT (Part two)!Free Demos (F'k TVT!) MP3s!
                     This mortal coil
                    Restrained opinion
         fans of other 'pop' music might like...
                 Say it ain't so, Molly!
     Through the transitive nightfall of diamonds...
Molly, making the list feel guilty and has the right to be that
                   Roger Waters on ALW
                  WS Dutch chart action
                    Re: Linear Boredom
                  Big Wasp Express Star
                  Hope This Explains It
                  My First XTC Purchase
                       Thanks Paul!

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    Chalkhills is compiled with Digest 3.7b (John Relph <relph@tmbg.org>).

I roll like a train.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Date: Mon, 12 Jun 2000 21:17:53 PDT
From: "Duncan Kimball" <dunks58@hotmail.com>
Subject: Cliched Musicals
Message-ID: <20000613041754.2479.qmail@hotmail.com>

Folks, I apologise for all these bitsy posts, but I can see no other
practical way to deal with the flood of digests. On with the show, good
health to you!

* * *

First and most importantly:

Harrison: your response to my post on musical cliches made me guffaw. Well
writ!

(I shockingly overlooked one of the all-time greats: "The Gumshoe", as
epitomised by Angelo Badalamente's music for "Twin Peaks")

Thanks for the info re Napster. Let's hope they get nailed. (as if...)
Pending the verdict, some decades hence, it appears to be (music) business
as usual -- musos go hungry, lawyers get fat ...

BTW re: telling your son to turn down -- it's official: you're an old fart!
Tee-hee!

* * *

Chris Vreeland (a man of wealth and taste) sez:

>It may be a stretch to say this, but as a guitar player, Andy Partridge's
>solos are beginning to compare favorably to Richard
>Thompson's. My new fantasy is that the two of them would write and
>record together. (Everybody sing! "To dreeeeam the imposssssible
>DREEEEEAM!)

Totally agree, Chris ... but it makes me recall the frisson I felt when I
heard that Todd Rundgren was producing 'Skylarking'. Of course that all
ended in tears, so to speak. Still, it's a thought to conjure with.

* * *

re: Opinions

I refer the group to the work of the admirable Mr J. Relph:

>"The views expressed herein are those of the individual authors."

I think that about covers it.

* * *

From: WTDK@aol.com
Subject: Worst band in the world

>Let's see, where to start? America,

Hmmm ... yeah, why not?

>Hall & Oates

No way??!! Sorry, but I actually like Hall & Oates (not to mention the Todd
connection). I saw them once in concert here in Sydney in the early 80s, and
they were frankly fantastic. G.E. Smith, late of the Saturday Night Live
house band, was their lead guitarist for quite a while, as I recall. A fine,
fine player.

>Emerson, Lake & Palmer,

No argument there! Ian McLagan bags them roundly in his book "All The Rage"
(which I just finished reading and it's a hoot!)

[Favourite quote - Mac describes Peter Grant meeting Bob Dylan:

'He walked over to where Bob Dylan sat at his table, pushing people aside as
he walked.

"Hello Bob, I'm Peter Grant. I manage Led Zeppelin."

There was a short tense silence, then Bob said "I don't come to you with my
problems." ']

>Starland Vocal Band

Phew -- lucky I had that bucket handy ...

>The Crazy World of Arthur Brown?

OK I'm not really familiar with the C.W.O.A. Brown oeuvre as a whole, but
given that he is one of the great English eccentrics AND the spiritual
father of Alice Cooper, the guy deserves a bit of respect. What exactly is
wrong with "Fire" anyway?

* * *

Addressing the recent presentations from The (Joe) Easter Theatre:

>Are we using our -real- names here? I'm not. Noone should, are you nuts. Be
>John Doe, anonymity is a blessing.

Why? What are you afraid of? Oh yeah, of course ... Tonya ...

(Behind you! Behind you!)

Speaking as a working class mope, I take no offence, simply because I have
no idea what the f*** you're on about. Ignorance IS bliss and I can laugh
without being embarrassed. However I must applaud your use of the word
"bibulous", which I believe is a first for Chalkhills.

So ... who are you really?

* * *

re: "In Another Life" (and Harrison's thesis about correspondences between
AV and WS) -- I'll pick up on Kevin Diamond's comments to say that think of
"In Another Life" as being the sequel to "I'd Like That" -- after 20-odd
years of marriage and a few kids.

* * *

The musicals thing (cans of worms our speciality):

- Joe: I am "cracked out", and happily so

- I blame Julie Andrews

- if I never hear "The Impossible Dream" or "Climb Every Mountain" again my
life will be the better for it

- a confession: I did see "Jesus Christ Superstar" several times in my
youth, and I enjoyed it very, very much. Yes. there were some good songs,
but my enjoyment was primarily because it comprised some of the best of
Australia's musical/theatrical talent at the time, including Stevie Wright
(ex-Easybeats), John Paul ("Love Is In The Air") Young, the guys from Air
Supply, Marcia Hines, and the totally electrifying
Jon English, who pretty nearly shat all over everyone else,
performance-wise. Not to mention the fantastic stage design by Brian
Thompson, who went on to design the 'Rocky Horror Picture Show'.

(By contrast, I saw the movie version when it came out and thought it sucked
like a black hole AND glaringly revealed the basic problem of the piece:
It's Crap.)

- a song is a song is a song. Sondheim, Bernstein et al are without doubt
great songwriters. Granted.

- a bunch of Good Songs stitched together together to create a musical still
comprises a stupid form of expression. "West Side Story" is a near as I will
go to admitting that the concept has any legs whatsoever. Maybe it's a
cultural thing, but as soon as the talking stops and the singing starts I
reach for the remote. It just doesn't make sense. Why WOULD anyone start
singing?

- Molly: I can take the heat, do your worst. I contend that Dame Lloyd
Wanker is a flabby, prissy, megalomanical hack, and a plagiarist to boot.
His recent works are riddled with blatant steals from composers whose boots
he is not fit to lick. The one masterstroke of his career has been his
supra-Kubrickian obsession with the control of his works. By ensuring that
they are only ever performed in professional productions that receive his
personal imprimatur, he can rest his house of cards on the certainty that
good-natured theatre folk will give it their all, regardless of (or perhaps,
because of?) the essential flabbiness of the material, thereby ensuring good
performances, at the least.

5. In closing, I present the One Unassailable Proof for my thesis "The
Musical is the stupidest art form":

"Cats"

I rest my case.

* * *

In response to MS's caring insight:

>Does anyone really buy these albums for his work instead of Andy's?

I offer the following personal Thoughts On Colin:

1. He is a GREAT songwriter, a superb bassist, and evidently a modest man
with tons of talent.

2. Colin's songs have developed (thank you, Gregory Sandoval ) into
beautifully observed watercolour miniatures, drawn from life. The work of a
master craftsman, they are the perfect -- and essential -- counterpoint to
Andy's teeming mythological tableaux.

3. He has, of necessity, his own identity as a songwriter. What would be the
point of having two Andys in the band?

4. If Colin *was* crap, as you suggest -- do you *really* think Andy would
still be working with him after 25 years?

If you can't say something nice ...

* * *

Although slightly apprehensive (it being one of my favourite works of
fiction) I cannot wait for the BBC "Gormenghast".

On a similar tangent: thanks to a watchful friend with a VCR, I was
fortunate enough to catch a telemovie called "Arabian Nights", based on the
1001 Nights stories, made in '99 for the US Hallmark cable channel.

I *really* recommend it, especially for those with you have kids. I was
expecting the usual putrid Americanised fairytale claptrap, as served up to
us in recent productions like "Merlin" and "Leprechauns", but I was
delighted to find my negative expectations dashed. The script by Peter
Barnes is literate, clever, very witty, and preserves the essential
drama, wonder and humour of the stories while slipping in some delightful
anachronisms and in-jokes. Above all, there was none of the usual 'dumbing
down' which seems to be de rigeur for such productions, and the heavy elemts
of the story - e.g. the Sultan threatening to kill Scherherezade every
morning -- are not downplayed. It's quite an adult treatment, although of
necessity they avoided the X-rated elements of some of the original stories.

What else? Beautiful photography, some quite brilliant shots and edits,
fantastic production design, including inventive use of computer special FX,
stunning locations in Turkey and Morocco, fabulous costumes, and a great
cast including Alan Bates, Jonathan Pryce, Alexei Sayle, Rufus
Sewell, and Jason Scott Lee.

I showed the 'Aladdin' segment to my kids yesterday and they were quite
literally spellbound through the whole thing. (And kudos to the producers
for playing a totally non-Anglo cast in this section). John Leguiziamo(?)
plays both the Ring Genie and the Lamp Genie, and does them brilliantly. The
Lamp Genie is superbly realised, right down to the smoke coming off his
finger and ear tips, and the nifty way a smoke ring comes out of his mouth
every time he says an "o". Even Vanessa Mae (yes, THAT Vanessa Mae) is quite
OK and the Sultan in the Aladdin sotiry is played by none other than guy who
was Kato in the Pink Panther films!

Pardon me rabbiting on but there's a really  funny bit when the Lamp Genie
first appears, which tickled my fancy. (You have to imagine Leguiziamo
painted blue, with shaven head, a long goatee, coloured contacts, pointy
teeth and ears, the Curse of Solomon inscribed on his face, delivering his
lines in a fruity Eastern accent while floating on a column of smoke which
begins where his waist would normally be)

Aladdin's mother, of course, wishes for money:

Genie: (sarcastically) "I've never heard that before! You must be the first
one to ever ask for that."

Mother: "Bushels and bushels of money! With money you don't need magic."

Genie: "Are you sure that's the way you want to go? I mean, money is great,
and all, but everybody asks for money. Why not
ask for something new and exciting?"

Aladdin: "How about ... some sort of flying machine?"

Genie: (even more sarcastically) "Flying ... machine?... So you could fly
all over the world? ... and we could have drinks ... and
someone could serve us peanuts?? A flying machine?! Maybe we should stick
with the money!"

* * *

>For the record...The really cool stuff from the 80's was made by XTC, the
>dB's, NRBQ, Kate Bush, Tom Waits, The >Jazz Butcher, Frank Zappa, and a few
>others that I can't think of right now.

Whew. Now I can throw away all that other useless stuff.

Seriously though, how about: Squeeze, Paul Kelly, Peter Gabriel, Midnight
Oil, Split Enz, Ry Cooder, INXS, Elvis Costello, The Saints, Cold Chisel,
(early) Simple Minds, The Cure, Models,The Black Sorrows, Scritti Politti,
...

Oh and that little guy ... now what *was* his name ... oh yeah!

PRINCE???????

My name is Dunky, and I am funky

------------------------------

Date: Tue, 13 Jun 2000 00:45:07 -0400
From: fheaney@erols.com
Subject: Well well Weller
Message-ID: <00cc01bfd4f2$27688a80$67e07ad1@default>

> 2) In the same vein, I'd really like to recommend Paul Weller's new solo
> album, Heliocentric. I've really disliked his past solo stuff (a little
> too heavy on the OCS-wankery for me), but this album is tremendous. It's
> well-crafted orchestral pop with a really rich, pastoral sound that
> never sounds forced or over-compensated (two things which I can
> unfortunately not say the same about WS). Almost harkens back to Mummer
> or ES, without the edge.

I splurged on an import of Heliocentric last week because I didn't feel like
waiting for it to be released here in the US, and I was happy to find that
Tower was selling the Japanese import version at the same price as the UK
version (unlike CDnow, where there's around a $10 difference), since the
Japanese CD has two extra tracks, of which "Heliocentric" (an instrumental
which I find surprising that it didn't make the actual album, both because
it shares the title of the album and because it's great) is probably my
favorite tune on the whole CD.  So if you feel like blowing a big wad of
cash, that's worth seeking out.  On the whole, I still think "Wild Wood" is
a better album, but this is his best since then; definitely far better than
the tepid "Stanley Road" and "Heavy Soul".

I went on an impatient import binge last week actually, also getting the new
Kirsty MacColl, "Tropical Brainstorm".  Grrrrrrrrreat.  I cannot get "In
These Shoes?" or "Us Amazonians" out of my head.  That CD will definitely be
duking it out with XTC for the year's top spot for me.

-- Francis Heaney

"We've got jobs, we've got children, why do we need a man?"
   -- Kirsty MacColl

------------------------------

Date: Tue, 13 Jun 2000 00:05:28 CDT
From: "vee tube" <veetube@hotmail.com>
Subject: An open letter to TVT (Part two)!Free Demos (F'k TVT!) MP3s!
Message-ID: <20000613050528.53978.qmail@hotmail.com>

     A short while ago I made a simple request of TVT,

1. Let me GIVE YOU $$$$ for the 'bonus' single CD!

2. Let us (Chalkhiller's) down MP3s from your P.O.S web-site.

                 Time's Up!

ITMWML & It didn't hurt a bit(demos) are now available, FREE!!!

          http://www.idrive.com/waspspun

                (Thanx to WTDK)

           Dear TVT; FUCK YOU VERY MUCH!

           Wanna dance? Come and get me!

          (I could put them up on Napster but,
            this is for Chalkhills ONLY!)

                   }---:)

P.S. Cowboys BLOW big chuckies! (Der-ilectric knows who he is!)

                 SPAM!AHOY!

------------------------------

Date: Mon, 12 Jun 2000 23:57:40 -0600
From: "Joseph Easter" <easter2000@earthlink.net>
Subject: This mortal coil
Message-ID: <001201bfd4fc$49889c40$7b730a3f@default>

*My regards to Sushiman for digging this out.

XTC is a dream. AV1 was my meditation disc for the summer of 99. I have
terribly fond memories and extraordinary fantasies that I derived from
those sounds. Think Knights in Shining Karma and how it just lilts away in
that dreamlike quality.

Waking up to this aurifluous mesh and being able to easily slide between
the past and the future. Seeing how every little detail is so crucial and
how effortless it can all just execute. And when Andy's voice dissapears
into horn. I believe that entire album was the manifestation of a
dream. Just the intro alone has that confusing kaleidoscope blitzkrieg
effect. And there are always so many sexual references, it is difficult to
believe otherwise. I'm sure this is the long term fallout for AP's sleeping
fetish/disorder/affinity. AV1 was almost as good for imagination training
as Samuel Barber or that old Russian dog, the Big T.

Having said that, WS is more like morning music where our folks are pushing
us out of our beds and we are running around like mad to brush our teeth
before the bus comes. Perhaps it should be morning star. Uh, oh, what's the
morning star.. Say it isn't so. He seems to have backed himself into a
corner again. Well, only one thing left to do and it must give us pause.
Good night all.

The Easter Bunny

PS Molly, we may be all light, but on this post, we are all electricity.
Don't take it so seriously. I'm sure noone hates you. And if they do,
they're not worth your time anyway. Everyone just breathe, relax, let it
all go, in and out, up and down...zzzzzzz.*

------------------------------

Date: Tue, 13 Jun 2000 08:50:16 +0100
From: "Chris" <bonyking@sniffout.com>
Subject: Restrained opinion
Message-ID: <001601bfd50c$3f1492e0$29a0a8c0@sigta>

Phew, payday finally came around and...

THE WHEEL AND THE MAYPOLE IS THE BEST SONG EVER WRITTEN EVER OH YES IT IS
OH YES IT IS

Not sure I like 'Wounded Horse' that much, though. Or 'Boarded Up', which
sounds like Bryan Ferry to me.

Off Topic : 3-2. Bugger.

Bless you all,

chris2

------------------------------

Date: 13 Jun 2000 14:46:02 Z
From: Christopher Moll <Christopher.Moll@marshmc.com>
Subject: fans of other 'pop' music might like...
Message-ID: <023B53946492A0A8*/c=US/admd=mci/prmd=marshmc/o=email/ou=NotesWREN/s=Moll/g=Christopher/@MHS>

greetings...

it's been a while since i've posted but that's been because i've been
busy.

for fans of 'pop' music you might want to check out the musical project
i have been working on for the last several months.
although this may seem like spamming i hope it doesn't come across that
way as i am a big xtc fan and was on the second
'chalkhills children' compilation. it's just that i'm curious to get
opinions of people with good musical taste...and that means you.

if you go to www.idrive.com/cosmoshow you will find 5 mp3's. when you
download them all you will want to create a playlist with the
order that is listed in the file title as they all blend together for a
big seamless experience. but...for those on a time budget who want to
get the most 'pop' for their time...download the track 'shine like
stars'.

anyway...about the project. we are called 'see venus' we have a girl
singer with an incredible voice...kinda sounding like a sad,
melancholic tracey thorn from 'everything but the girl'. as for the
music...if you mix brian wilson and the beatles with a touch
of harpsichords, string sections, trumpets combined with bossa nova,
drum-n-bass and general other worldliness you might get
the picture. and to boot we did the whole thing at home.

please take a moment and listen...if any of you like it and can help
out in any way please don't hesitate to contact me.

as for 'wasp star'...i like it and don't like it. on one hand i like
it's directness but it also feels like there's something missing (i
know...i know...

you might say dave gregory...but the guitar playing is fairly solid so
it's not that). I think the problem is something that i encountered
while working on my recording and it's this...i read in an interview
that andy said that they pretty much used the 'pod' guitar amp
simulator on most of the tracks and i think therein lies the
problem. while most of these guitar sims are incredible sounding there
is still something missing. i know because i originally used it as
well and while the sound is incredibly clean...it's almost too
clean. we were forced to go back and rerecord certain aspects of the
guitar parts because when you mike the guitar amps up you get a
certain air and a tiny bit of sludge that these amp sims fail to
recreate. that is what i think 'wasp star's problem is...it's too
clean...add that to andy's anal retentive guitar playing where he
tries to get everything rhythmically perfect and it makes it sound
just...too clean and perfect. and people may claim that it's because
they recorded on digital ADAT's and not tape but i don't think that's
it...beside the gear has gotten much better sounding. i just think
they should have intentionally added some sonic sludge.

my two cent's worth...which with inflation's not really worth even
that.

anyway...take a listen to my stuff and tell me what you think.

cheers,
chris

------------------------------

Date: Tue, 13 Jun 2000 07:09:37 -0700 (PDT)
From: Brown <mb2@deltanet.com>
Subject: Say it ain't so, Molly!
Message-ID: <200006131409.HAA16119@mail2.deltanet.com>

...come on Molly, don't jump ship on an activity you obviously enjoy...
(your xtc listening parties)...

So you got mad and told everyone to bugger off?  So f*cking what?  That's
the first bit of back bone I've ever detected in you!

I've stepped on my tongue more than once around here... you just dust off
your po' little ego and carry on, sis..

Stop apologizing for being alive... and don't feel so sorry for yourself,
kay?

..There.. the great and powerful OZ has spoken!

Back to work,

Debora Brown

------------------------------

Date: 13 Jun 2000 05:35:51 -0700
From: unna@worldmailer.com
Subject: Through the transitive nightfall of diamonds...
Message-ID: <20000613123551.28302.cpmta@c008.sfo.cp.net>

My bags are almost packed. I have a nice storage of non-perishables
ready, and 2 cases of Evian. To hell with the sunscreen, I'm going to
use an amplifier. That's right, I'm taking Wasp Star on the road! I'll
be road testing the latest XTC release on the beautiful Outer Banks of
NC. Also included in this field trial will be Skylarking which for
some reason seems to fit with Wasp Star. This won't be any luxury
vacation, we're talking 9 straight days of beach camping and 8 nights
of sandy, sweaty sheets, 9-15 cold-water showers, and an unforeseen
number of visits to the community toilets! What will be the effect of
XTC on an individual living in these conditions. If my theory is
correct, the effect will be that of an enclosing bubble of cool air
resplendent with the intoxicating nectars of the heavens and it's
populous of cherubin. But I'm stating the obvious here.

------------------------------

Date: Tue, 13 Jun 2000 08:11:31 -0400
From: "Duncan Watt" <dwatt@fastestmanintheworld.com>
Subject: Molly, making the list feel guilty and has the right to be that
Message-ID: <200006131211.IAA21261@gilgamesh.nh.ultra.net>

way, and don't tell her she can't
Ouch, Molly! Can't be taking this stuff seriously, now. Just 'cos I hate
Andrew Llooyydd Webber's music as much as Elvis Costello does doesn't mean
you should have the right to try and make me stop hating it because I do.
And I'm going to keep hating it even though all of you want me to not hate
it, because you can't tell me I can't.

Mollllllyyyyyy don't get all pissed off 'cos of a few nitwits. What would
Andy do?

Your Pal Duncan Watt

------------------------------

Date: Tue, 13 Jun 2000 10:01:57 +0100
From: Ian Stickland <ian@airhead.demon.co.uk>
Subject: Roger Waters on ALW
Message-ID: <3945F885.22586006@airhead.demon.co.uk>

For me Mr Waters says it all about Mr Webber on his Amused To Death
Album...

"We cower in our shelters
With our hands over our ears
Lloyd-Webber's awful stuff
Runs for years and years and years

An earthquake hits the theatre
But the operetta lingers
Then the piano lid comes down
And breaks his f**king fingers

It's a miracle"

And apart from a severe dislike to his music, the little git tried to
run
me over in Winchester a few years back.

IanS.

------------------------------

Date: Tue, 13 Jun 2000 11:41:16 +0200
From: a.de.koning@bp.vnu.com
Subject: WS Dutch chart action
Message-ID: <C12568FD.003651AE.00@bpa.vnu.com>

Well... not much action: WS stays at number 30 in it's second week on
the 'Scherpe rand van platenland'. So, unless some single comes out
that draws attention the chances of it reaching the actual album
top100 are very slim.  Kink-FM has the album going up to number 12
(from 20) in it's second week on the 'Mania 30'.

Dutch Music magazine OOR has had a good review, but the album hasn't
reached the 11-tal (like AV1 did) nor their 'Moordlijst' (not even
indicidual lists).

Andre

------------------------------

Date: Tue, 13 Jun 2000 11:25:48 EDT
From: PTomek@aol.com
Subject: Re: Linear Boredom
Message-ID: <96.616eea0.2677ac7c@aol.com>

J. Gardner wrote:

>Stupidly Happy
>
>Linear boredom.
<snip>
>If I was playing drums on this tune, I would have to say, "Andy, this
>song needs a middle eight and a bridge or two!"
>
>It just didn't *go* anywhere, and was too repetitive.  I got the sense
>that Colin was really bored playing bass on this tune, b/c he too had no
>where to go.  He kept sliding up and down the scale, but only within one
>chord's framework.
<snip>
>It's just not happening for me, despite the catchy and jangly phrasing
>of the lyrics.  Sorry folks.  This is the only tune on this record which
>doesn't click for me.

Uh, excuse me, did you notice the title? It's *supposed* to be stupid. The
drums and bass are supposed to go nowhere--that's the point! In addition,
Andy has said in several interviews that the drum pattern was based on
"Jumping Jack Flash" by the Stones--another monumentally simple
track. Drum Machine 101 before there were drum machines.

I read your earlier post about "Playground," and I agree--Chuck Sabo did a
gre at job on the drums, especially the intro. I love the way the drums
"stutter," spitting out more and more of the phrase, always in an odd
number of beats against the 4/4 guitar, until finally he utters the whole
phrase and slams into the 4/4 groove. Very powerful and very cool, and a
great way to start the album.

Anyway, believe me: stupidity can be a drummer's best friend, if you're
smart enough to know when to use it.

Pat, aka "duhhhhh"
The World According to Pat!
http://www.cgi101.com/~tompat

------------------------------

Date: Tue, 13 Jun 2000 16:51:24 +0100
From: "Davies, Huw (TPE)" <Huw.Davies3@Wales.GSI.Gov.UK>
Subject: Big Wasp Express Star
Message-ID: <7209B69A281BD4119EE50001FA7EA975AEAE10@WOMAIL2>

A few observations:

I can understand these Big Express and Wasp Star comparisons as the Big
Express is the album that WS is the most like. However, I have this feeling
that in the end The Big Express is the superior album. For a guitar-based
album there's something a bit too restrained about WS. There's nothing to
compare with Train Running Low... where the band just "lets go". However,
WS wins points for having probably the best closing three songs of XTC's
career.

Musicals? Hey they're not all that bad. They're one of the great art forms
of the early 20th century. West Side Story was probably the last great
musical. Things went went a bit downhill from then. (Yes, Sondheim may be
an exception).

Just out of curiousity, is anyone out there a fan of the Divine Comedy?
There's bound to be a few XTC fans out there who also like Scott Walker,
and I think anyone who likes Scott Walker will also appreciate the Divine
Comedy. Casanova has got to be one of the best albums of the 1990's.

Huw Davies

------------------------------

Date: Tue, 13 Jun 2000 11:51:32 EDT
From: Hbsherwood@aol.com
Subject: Hope This Explains It
Message-ID: <76.2dc57f.2677b284@aol.com>

>From: Paul.Culnane@dcita.gov.au
>Subject: Different Ears

>Things whizz back and forth across the stereo spectrum, and
>little bits of musical detail lost in the melee - if you employ Method
>(1) - infiltrate the fuzzy hairs on your [Harrison or some other egghead!
>Help me here: what's the bone in yer ear with the little hairs on it that
>sense the sound vibrations?], er, ear `ole!

KING OF QUEENS STAR ARRAIGNED ON ASSAULT CHARGES TODAY

Remini Attacked Talk-Show Host

"All a Terrible Misunderstanding!" says Voyd

Los Angeles, CA, June 13, 2000--Leah Remini, who plays Carrie Heffernan on
the CBS television series "King of Queens," was arraigned today in Los
Angeles District Court on charges that she gratuitously assaulted
talk-show host Nolan Voyd on the set of his afternoon interview program,
"Words, Words, Words!" Remini counters that the florid and flamboyant Voyd
made unwelcome sexually suggestive remarks and goaded her into the attack
to shore up Voyd's show's flagging ratings.

In an interview with Entertainment Weekly, Voyd vehemently denied making
sexual remarks to Remini, and expressed bewilderment that she should have
suddenly gone berserk on the set, flinging flower vases and punching
Voyd's head. "I don't know what happened! One moment I was asking her to
sing us a song, and the next she was howling like a banshee and throwing
Blue Willow at me. The woman's completely _non compos mentis_!"

We have obtained a transcript of the moment that Remini attacked Mr. Voyd,
and reproduce it here:

VOYD: So, Leah, I'm told you have been recording a new album of torch
songs!
REMINI: Yeah, that's right, Nolan. I used to be a singer, you know, before
I started acting. I thought it was time to get back into that.
VOYD: Well, your speaking voice is just lovely, Leah; I'm sure you sing
beautifully as well.
REMINI: Thanks!
VOYD: Would you grace us with a song now?
REMINI: Oh, I dunno....
VOYD: Oh come on! Please, tickle my cochlea!
REMINI: Come again...?
VOYD: Tickle my cochlea!
REMINI: Look, buddy--
VOYD: Come now, dear, I'm only asking--
REMINI: I don't care what you do with your pervy boy guests, but I'm not
gonna play this game--
VOYD: I was only asking you to sing! To tickle my cochlea, which it's the
bone in your ear with the little hairs on it that sense the sound
vibrations--
REMINI: (no longer listening, attacks, shrieking curses and beating her
fists on Voyd's head)

Police forensic experts confess themselves stumped. "I'm sure some form of
misunderstanding took place, but it sure beats me what that might have
been," says one court source, speaking on condition of anonymity.

This latest controversy is strangely reminiscent of an incident last year,
when actress Raquel Welch appeared on Voyd's show, along with her pet cat,
a white Angora named Spinky. Welch asked Voyd, "Would you like to pet my
pussy?" and Voyd replied, "Why certainly not! What a disgusting idea!"
Welch left the set in a huff.

Harrison "Perhaps it was a minute and a huff" Sherwood

------------------------------

Date: Tue, 13 Jun 2000 12:33:51 EDT
From: "Stacy Starkweather" <stacystarkweather@hotmail.com>
Subject: My First XTC Purchase
Message-ID: <20000613163351.71195.qmail@hotmail.com>

Help me out, here.  My first XTC purchase was an edition of Oranges and
Lemons which was printed on three CD-3s (ya' know: those little bitty CDs
they tried to get people to buy those first few years of CD technology. .
.), all of which came stored in a little box that reminds me of an
eight-track tape package form the 70's.  Does anybody know what I am talking
about?  What is the story behind this edition of O&L?  Is it rare?  I've had
this thing for years and have never known anything about it!  (Other than,
of course, the music is great!)
I have no idea if it is rare or not...but I have it too.
Yesterday I opened up my big box of 45's and discovered quite the treasure
of XTC singles...clear vinyl "Are you Recieving Me" (2)and tons of
others...which brings me to wonder...I have most everything for singles, Cd
singles and the like through Nonsuch (including a signed copy of Nonsuch
purchased used at a record store...for $7.95)
and I wonder what I should do with it? The music is available on CD so ...is
there a place or site that specializes in trading this stuff? Would be
interested to know 'cause I don't know if I need to hold on to this stuff
anymore...
Hope everyone is enjoying listening to(and talking about)the new album. New
Xtc albums (singles w/B-sides etc...though this hardly happens anymore)
have always been a habit, and whwn the Badfinger-ish blast of Playground
hit...I smiled as always. I certainly get a chuckle reading the myriad
perspectives of the people who post on this list. Thanks for the chuckles...
Stacy

------------------------------

Date: Tue, 13 Jun 2000 09:37:28 -0700 (PDT)
From: nross <PhoenixYellowRose@rocketmail.com>
Subject: Thanks Paul!
Message-ID: <20000613163728.25720.qmail@web2905.mail.yahoo.com>

Paul (not McCartney) wrote:

Nicole:

I believe the line in "Live And Let Die" to which you referred actually
goes: "But if this ever changing world in which we're living..."  Put
that
way, it *is* grammatically correct.

yours pedantically
~~~ p @ u l

......................

I must say thank you for enabling me to enjoy the song again. This
lyric makes a lot more sense now. It was driving me nuts... I even
brought it up to my parents and they just laughed and asked if I
believed in poetic license.

Thank you, Nicole

=====
Nicole's internet music station:
http://radio.sonicnet.com/mymusiclisten.asp?name=phoenixyellowrose

------------------------------

End of Chalkhills Digest #6-168
*******************************

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